Resilience diary- pain today: 7/10. Photo: "Šṯřãpș" After spending nearly half my life by thirteen in plaster casts I was not a big fan of straps to aid me in walking or running. We tried a few of them for my knees for longer hikes with scouts but i didn't like them and found that as they hurt anyways so long as they work I'll keep them free. This mindset i think applied to my attitude to medicine and general interference in my body of which i didn't even understand yet and so felt uneasy about messing with it when i had no baseline. I received only unhelpful or negative sort of prospects when speaking to any medical professional which looking back was handled pretty well as i ignored most of it, though it still left a scar. The last two weeks ive been reliant on my back brace to keep me together. I understand my body in a lot of ways now and know when i need the support. I always thought it would be my knees that would cause me most issues. So im still learning. #project117 #unaided #straps #support #growingup

Resilience diary- pain today: 7/10. Photo: "Šēäṟċħ" The last few days have been a wild ride of memories, excitement and old lessons coming back to use. It also highlighted to me the reliance on electricity and internet in the common age. As a teen in scouts I really enjoyed problem solving in wild weather. I've woken up in my sleeping bag soaking wet as a creek formed underneath me. A reason to stop using tents with separated floors to walls... getting one's sleeping gear wet is really the only killer to things though. Broken tents, bags, forgotten cooking gear or even food can be resolved by changing plans. This flexibility experience i feel helps me in my long term dealing with my body and just general life. Plans are great but are not always possible. Externalities influence everything from before and after any plan and so i find being less specific in plans gives way to opportunity as well. To be fair it doesn't always work out and failure is a component, but it exists even in the most detailed plans too so i don't go to that much effort. As with everything i learnt and based on my physical limits i find adventuring to be easier and dealing with failure easier to as i know that if i keep trying I'll find a way, and if not i move on to something else. I'm having the best time at the moment. I'm worried about my back as is worse and needs looking at but outside of these usual complaints, I'm happy. Having the most comfortable bed in the van also helps. Comfort is a new addition to my camping ventures. The rest is old habits. #project117 #search #peekaboo #find #wild

Resilience diary- pain today: 7/10. Photo: "Ṟúń" Storms, summits, slate and sun. Its all happening, its so much fun. No time to stay still, gotta... gotta run! #project117

Resilience diary- pain today: 7/10. Photo: "Śṯřäṉḏ" No reception, hoping this gets through! 🙌😜 #project117 #wales #beach #attitude #stones

Resilience diary - pain today: 7/10. Photo: "Vìćè" Every friday night as is tradition, candles, wine and bread. By thirteen i was starting to find booze to be a wonderful feeling. I wouldnt be having much, maybe a hundred mls of as much as i could sneak in. It was a beautiful distraction from my usual physical feeling of pain, discomfort and general confusion, things that still plague me today. And so occasionally i would sneak a sip from any bottle happening to be in the fridge. I got caught eventually and so the opportunities were reduced but the desire hadn't. I had to be careful with finding such vices as they could destroy me quite quickly. But the relief they gave is a strong attractor and so I either was taught or chose myself to not take on any extra chemical help. It's meant that alcohol eventually turned into my overindulgence as the years rolled on and generally I've been ok with it though there have been times where i surprised myself and so took a year off not too long ago. These days it's greatly reduced but still there, always tempting me to imbibe and escape my suffering or more realistically, masking it till later. Was a slow journey though, from the start to end of my teens and i was starting to hit puberty and become a total twat also, lots was being learnt, who knew where id go. #project117 #wine #vice #escape #addiction